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For the past couple of months, I've been working on something that my friends have called me sadistic for even wanting to attempt. I've always been bothered by how terribly made the game Sonic the Hedgehog, or Sonic 06, has been made. Oh course I don't have the no how, nor the time to remake a whole game, but I just felt the need to do some justice to what I can possibly fix for the blue blur. 
So I began re-writing the plot, while attempting to stay true to what the story was originally trying to tell, while also taking away what wasn't necessary, adding what I felt was benefit the story, as well as fix all of the holes that made the story contradict itself. 
As of writing this journal, I've actually already got pretty far, and as I wrote, I felt the need to also want to make it live. So if I were to decide to animate this fan-fiction, would that be something you guys would enjoy? Or do you think it would be a waste of my time?
As I said I've already gotten a good chunk of the story re-written, so I think this is what I would like to do. 
What if I were to upload bits and pieces of the story here to Deviant Art one chapter at a time for you guys to critique and enjoy? Then once the whole story is done, and perfected to the best of my abilities as an amateur writer, I can animate it.

I would like to post the first part of the story here in this journal, and let you guys decide if you think it's even worth a read, if you guys like it, I'll begin to put out the rest of the story as I continue to write it onto DA.

So here is what I made as the first chapter of a re-writren Sonic 06.

Sonic 06 Remade Script


Sonic 06 Remade Script


-This story begins in the city of the Sun, Soleanna. A large festival is going in the middle of the night, dancers and entertainers all over with fireworks in the air. The majority of the festival is taking place by the large canal that flows through a large portion of the city. And riding down this canal is a largeow pass by. The taller girl appeared timid as she waved, giving a small smile, while the younger girl was more energetic, waving her hand wildly, sometimes pulling the older girl around in her excitement. Pretty soon, the gondola began to approach a large altar that rest in the middle of a large lake like opening in the canal. As the gondola drew closer, the excitement began to die down. Once the boat finally reached the altar, the crowds became silent, the dancers and entertainers stopped their performances, and everyone began to gather around the edge of the canal, to whiteness the event that was about to take place. When the boat came to a full stop, the two girls on the bow stepped off onto the altar platform, where numerous priests, lined up side by side, waiting for them. The priest in the middle held a lit torch, and stepped forward as the two girls walked towards him, they bowed to each other, and priest began to speak.

Preist: Princess Elise. As the ruler of Soleanna, do you except this flame? And light our great monument to pay respects to our great god Solaris?

Elise: I shall.

 The priest gives a smile, then hands Elise the torch. The priest steps aside, and Elise walks past him towards a large cauldron filled with oil. When she gets close to it, she turns around and holds the torch in front of her, preparing to start a speech. But before she can start speaking, she becomes dazed at the sight of the fire, and begins to have a vision. She finds herself floating above Soleanna, only it's engulfed in fire. She watches in confusion and terror, but all of those emotions become pure fear when she notices a large fire in the shape of a monster, slowly emerging from the flames. The monster slowly turns its head towards Elise, it stares at her with raging eyes of fire, whiter than a blanket of snow. Elise stares into its eyes with pure horror, until all of a sudden she hears a voice.

???: Elly? Hey! Elly!

-All of a sudden, it all stops, and Elise finds herself back in reality, with the priests staring at her patiently, and the younger girl pulling on Elise's dress.

Younger girl: Elly, you're not getting stage fright again are you?

Elise: Oh? Uh… No Lacey…. I'm fine….

-Elise then begins her speech.

Elise: We give thanks for the blessed flames. May we always continue to have peace. 

-The view pans to a large monument with the symbol of Soleanna marked on it.

Elise: Sun of Soleanna, guide and watch over us with your eternal light….

-Elise then walks towards the cauldron and dips the lit torch into it. The fire catches and rushes through a set oiled path and eventually lights the monument with a glorious display, the crowd cheers. Elise then waves to the crowd once more, until the ceremony is interrupted by missiles, which fly in under the guise of the fireworks. The missiles hit various parts of the town, Elise wraps herself around Lacey as the chaos continues, and watches as the crowds flee for their lives. She then sees blinding red lights shining down around her, she looks up to see a large air craft hovering right above them. Servants surround themselves around the two princesses, and attempt to get them out of there, but are soon stopped by robots, who were falling out of a chamber from the large air craft. Soleanna police then come in, and open fire on the robots, but their bullets and useless, and the robots turn around and fire back at the police, while keeping the princesses and their servants trapped. The police stand down, but keep their guns armed at the robots, while the robots do the same. Lacey begins to cry.

Lacey: Elly! What's going on?!?! I'm scared!!!

-Elise clutches Lacey tightly.

Elise: It's ok Lacey! I promise it's-…..

-Elise stops herself when she notices a small air craft hovering down from the larger one. One of the smaller robots then steps up.

Robot: Now presenting your great new ruler…..

-The air craft reaches eye level, and on it is a large man with a long mustache, wearing a read spandex coat, bowing.

Robot: Dr. Eggman!!!

-Lacey then says with a small smirk.

Lacey: Dr. Eggman? That's a silly name.

-Elise shushes Lacey, and then looks back up at Eggman.

Eggman: A pleasure to meet you at last, Princess of Soleanna. I've come here to obtain the secret of the Flames of Disaster from you.

Elise: The Flames of…. Disaster?

Eggman:  Yes…. Though I may know more than you can even fathom right now, I will enlighten you that you are vital for me to be able to obtain those secrets.

Elise: I….. I don't know what you're talking about!

Eggman:  You will in due time. Now Princess, this way please.

-Eggman gestures for Elise to get on his air craft. Elise stands still in puzzlement, but then Lacey jumps out of Elise's arms.

Lacey: No you ugly man! You can't have my sister! Go find your Flames of Plaster somewhere else!

Elise: Lacey!

Eggman: Grrrr….. Why you arrogant little-…

-Eggman then notices a blue gem on the necklace hanging around Lacey's neck, Eggman recognizes it immediately.

Eggman: A Chaos Emerald! Well now… The Princess and a chaos emerald all in one package. Heheheh.

-Elise looks at Lacey's necklace and gasps, and Lacey looks puzzled.

Eggman: Very well young lady, I will allow you to accompany your sister if you'd so wish, just so long as I can see that pretty necklace you're wearing when you come aboard.

Elise: No!

-Elise kneels down and looks at Lacey.

Elise: Lacey, please give me your necklace.

Lacey: But Elly!

Elise: Please… This isn't up for discussion.

-Lacey pauses with a sad look in her eyes, but then nods and gives Elise the necklace. Elise then kisses Lacey's forehead, and begins to walk towards Eggman.

Lacey: Elly!

Servant: Your grace! What are you doing!? Don't go!

-Elise stops but ignores their cries. She then looks at Eggman while clutching the necklace tightly.

Elise: If I go with you, will you call off your machines and do no more harm to Soleanna or its people?

-Eggman grins.

Eggman: Of course. Now then Princess. While I am a patient man, I'm also on a tight schedule, so come along now.

-Elise stands for a second hesitant, but then gathers up the courage to move forward. But as soon as she takes the first step, the wind begins to pick up, and just like that a blue vortex begins. Elise looks around astonished and puzzled, until the vortex stops, and she see's a blue hedgehog standing on one of the columns. 

Hedgehog: My…. That's a pretty snazzy performance there!

-Everyone stares in awe, but Eggman becomes angry.

Eggman: Not that irritating hedgehog again!!! Attack!

-All of the robots then turn and aim for the blur hedgehog, and begin firing on him. The hedgehog jumps, and begins to rush into each one at supersonic speed. Half way he stops on Eggman's craft and taunts him, then destroys the the rest of the robots, with the final one ,which was standing right by Lacey, he stuns, then topples it over by tapping it with his toe. Lacey stares at the hedgehog with sparkles and glee in her eyes.

Lacey: That… was… so… AWESOME!!!! You're so cool!!

-The hedgehog just smirks and scratches his noses. Elise stares in awe.

Elise: Who… Who are you?

Sonic: I'm Sonic. Sonic the Hedgehog!

-Then Eggman starts throwing a tantrum while beating on his craft.

Eggman: No you don't! You won't get away that easily!

-But with the robots gone, Eggman failed to realize the Soleanna police quickly come up and surround him. Eggman panics and pulls up his craft out if the line of sight for the bullets.

Eggman: Oh yeah! Well see how you like this!

Eggman pushes a button, and the hatch of the large air craft above then opens once again, and more robots then begin to rain down.

Soleanna Captain: No! We have to get the princess out of here now! 

Sonic: No problem! You just get these people outta here!

-Sonic then picks up Elise and runs off.

Eggman: Oh no you don't! I won't let you get away!

-Eggman send his robots as well as more missiles after Sonic.

Elise:  Wait! My sister!

Sonic: Don't worry! I know Egghead, and all he wants is you and that emerald, your sis will be fine!

-As Sonic is running from robots and missiles while carrying Elise, a quick shot is shown of the silhouette of another figure, watching from the shadows. Sonic continues to dodge missiles, Elise gripping onto Sonic tightly as she becomes more and more scared. Eventually a missile lands and explodes right in front of Sonic's path, Sonic stops in time, but the explosion frightens Elise badly. Sonic stands to catch his breath and to see if they lost Eggman.

Sonic: Ok. I think we're in the clear for now, but let's get you somewhere-

-Sonic see's that Elise is tearing up. Trying to hold back from crying.

Sonic: Hey.. Are you ok?

Elise: Get away!

-Elise struggles out of Sonic's arms and pushes him away.

Sonic: Ouch! Jeez, that's a funny way to thank me for saving your royal butt!

Elise: No you don't understand! *sniff* Please stay away from me!

Sonic: Why? Tell me wha-

-Suddenly a light fire surrounds Elise, Sonic looks astonished. 

Sonic: H-Hey! You're on fire! What's going on!?

-Elise turns around with tears poring down her face.

Elise: I said get away! RUN!!!!!

-Suddenly the flames around Elise became bigger, Sonic endures the heat and attempts to help, but suddenly the flames become combustion and a large explosion happens. Eggman see's the explosion from afar. The smoke clears, both Sonic and Elise lay on the ground unconscious. Eggman drives up from above and see's them, then grins.

Eggman: Well now. It appears the princess was a little too hot to handle even for you Sonic.

-Eggman picks up Elise with an arm on his craft, and places her next to him. Then two robots appear by Eggman.

Eggman: Take care of the hedgehog.

-Eggman flies away, and the two robots walk up to the unconscious Sonic and point their guns at him. Suddenly a whirlwind begins to kick up around the robots, to the point where they fall over and fall apart. Then a silhouetted figure walks up to Sonic, and the scene fades to black. 


So tell me what you think, any critiques are welcome. Please let me know how you feel, and thank you for your time.

  • Mood: Bliss
  • Listening to: The sound of my keyboard being abused by fingers.
  • Reading: Over my journal.
  • Watching: A computer screen.
  • Playing: The typing game.

deviantID

w00twithBrawl
BrawlFan1's DA Page
Artist | Student | Film & Animation
United States
I'm your basic fun loving gamer who to try and make people laugh.

If you wish to contact me, have any questions or need some help, you can contact me by skype. My skype is BrawlFan1.
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Comments


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:iconkk862:
KK862 Apr 8, 2014  Hobbyist Photographer
DUDE, can I be a part of your next Super Smash Update, that show us the 2 newcomers?
Reply
:icon4eyez95:
4eyez95 Apr 5, 2014  Professional Digital Artist
Hello there friend^^
Reply
:iconlazbro64:
Im asking you to please reply.
Reply
:iconwajose-the-plumper:
wajose-the-plumper Feb 27, 2014  Student Digital Artist
Dude,Just be patient.
I have a friend which just reply 2-3 Months on dA.
He may have Important things to do like College works or just very busy.
Reply
:iconlazbro64:
No! This is ridiculous, he's ignoring me, he can take time to do his videos with his other friends and his SOnic 06 thing but won't talk to me or answer a single reply, that's disrespectful   
Reply
:iconwajose-the-plumper:
wajose-the-plumper Apr 10, 2014  Student Digital Artist
Then go do something else than just spamming his page asking to him respond you,
Belive me that wont end well,and if you keep doin that,is gonna get a point to him block you.
If that happens you cant do shit about it.
Reply
(1 Reply)
:iconsolothefalcon:
Or mabye animate the super smash adventures Something like that?
Reply
:iconmrjasontothedl:
MrJasonToTheDL Feb 19, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
It's been a long-ass time, BJ. But, I figure it's because you're busy.
Reply
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